Lets Get Happy
As couples move throughout their lives, new opportunities arise alongside new challenges. Dr. Sara Yogev, author of “A Couple’s Guide to Happy Retirement and Aging,” helps us understand that building a team at home early in our relationships will help with transitions now AND later in life.
According to Dr. Yogev, couples often neglect communicating about their needs and expectations through large transitions, but being aware of how change impacts the marital dynamic is huge. To keep a handle on big changes, Dr. Yogev recommends “both spouses to take time to think about what he or she wants, exchange this information, try to help each other with these goals and be willing to compromise.”
Following are 10 ideas Dr. Yogev recommends for navigating a happier retirement – many are great tips that couples could practice at any age!
- Share expectations – Take time to talk about what you both are expecting.
- Address your relationship with money – Get a sense of your “money style.” Are you a spender or saver? Doing this helps you develop a common financial plan even if your styles are different.
- Prepare for mixed feelings – With every big transition, it’s good to remember there will be some things we like, and some things we find more challenging.
- Address issues as they surface – When problems arise, avoid the temptation to sweep things under the rug.
- Custom design your days, weeks, months – Use a calendar to make sure both of your needs are being met and don’t over schedule.
- Celebrate your body – Getting into a routine of exercise and eating right is something that will benefit you across the life cycle.
- Celebrate your sexuality – Just like creating healthy routines around exercise and eating, couples also benefit from investing in their connection to each other.
- Retirement inherently requires us to “say good-bye to work.” However, Yogev encourages couples to try working shorter days, or shorter weeks as a way to transition into this change – something Shared Care parents have likely already had lots of experience with!
- Give each other physical and emotional space – Not having set work schedules that keep you apart, retirement requires becoming more intentional about the time you want to spend together and the time you need for your own interests.
- Stay mentally active – There are many ways to stay active in life. Support each other to find new and engaging interests.
Whether phasing into retirement, or balancing work and family, this list reminds us that couples will gain a lifetime of benefits by taking steps to work as a team to meet their own needs and their needs as a couple.
Want to learn more? Why not take a look at our ‘Free Resources’ page for and send for ThirdPath’s Work Family Options Workbook.